I started my blog in January of 2013 as a way to journal about my personal struggles to determine my value. Value as a woman, wife, mom, employee, friend…you get the picture. These particular struggles stem from old tapes that play in my head that try to tell me that my value is limited. I have to continually remind myself that these lies do not define me.
As I mentioned last year, I do not typically make resolutions, though it worked really well in 2013 for me to have a “theme”. I closed my very first blog entry with the following statement: “So 2013, be good and gentle with me and my family, and may I be met with constant reminders of my declaration to return.” I cannot tell you how many times throughout the year I was reminded that I declared to return. Here is very brief summary of how well I did in my return to these areas in 2013.
Sanity: Depends on how much I sleep, and what I eat, but the fog continues to lift.
Sensibility: We are acutely aware of our chemical burden. This continues to be an area of passion and research for me. We made a huge change in April of 2013 to cut processed food from our diet, and switch to what is considered “Real Food”. Still a battle to eat wisely each day. Budget…continues to be a struggle. More to come on this in 2014.
Service: In early 2013, I began serving on the board of a large local mother’s club. I am coordinating a program which organizes meals and other service-related tasks for moms that welcome new babies. Food, and new mamas. Perfect fit.
My God: I wander. Therefore, I am not sure that God will ever stop calling me to return. It is something that I hope to be a life-long pursuit. Both Him calling me back, and me chasing hard after His goodness, love and scandalous grace.
This new year, I plan to pursue more perspective in the things that really matter in my life. Often, it takes a great sacrifice or tragedy to put life into perspective, but I am not waiting. I am choosing over the next 12 months to sacrifice selfishness in search of character development. I will not always get to control my circumstances, or the outcome of my trials, but I do have a choice about my attitude, and response. This will be my 2014 theme. The ability to choose.
I plan to begin 2014 in January by choosing stillness. This will initially mean developing a discipline of giving the first portion of my day to God in quiet and prayer. I LOVE sleep, so when I tell you that this is a sacrifice, please believe me.
Honestly though, this is about SO much more than morning quiet time or prayer. How will my relationships, parenting, work/business life, budget change if I choose to be still? Can I be a better listener, think/pray before making a decision or purchase, pause before speaking, consider others before acting? Will the manufactured hustle that I create in my life subside? What will I learn about myself in the silence? What will God speak to me in the quiet?
Looking forward to January’s journey and the insight.
~S